Empathy

Empathy is one of the key skills any customer service agent (or any position above) needs to develop. It is the "human connection," the ability to understand and share the feelings of another, and it is different from "Sympathy" (feeling sorry for someone).

• Sympathy: "That's too bad." (Distant)
• Empathy: "I can imagine how stressful that must be for you, especially right before the holidays. I would be upset too."

Empathy is not about agreeing with the customer (the customer might not always be right), but it is about validating their feelings. It turns a confrontation ("Me vs. You") into a partnership ("Us vs. The Problem"), and it is one of the fastest ways to de-escalate an angry caller.

Let's review a quick example: 

A customer is calling because their service was cut off. They admit they forgot to pay the bill because they were in the hospital. They are embarrassed and stressed. A robot would just say, "It's ok. Please pay $50 to reconnect the service." An empathetic agent pauses to acknowledge the human element first, "I'm truly sorry to hear that, and I hope you're feeling better," and then searches for a feasible solution, "let's see which options we have to get your service back and running."

There are 3 key elements in which agents can work to develop their empathy skills:

• Using "Power Words" and incorporating phrases like "I can imagine," "I understand why," and "That sounds incredibly frustrating" into their script.
• Matching the customer's tone: If the customer is sad/quiet, by lowering their voice to be softer. If the customer is excited, by raising their energy. However, agents should always avoid matching an irate customer at all costs.
• Before responding to a difficult situation, agents can ask themselves: If this were my grandmother/parent/me on the phone, how would I want the agent to respond?

Empathy builds trust; once a customer feels agents care, they stop fighting and start working with them.